The mayor: “You are non-residents, aren’t you?”
Bob: “Yes, we are.”
The mayor: “That’s why you do not know the rules. What’s the doctor’s name?”
Bob: “Dr. Butch Ercoin.”
The mayor: “Oh, Woody. He is a specialist. He is specialized in wood-cutting.”
Bob: “Wood-cutting?”
The mayor: “Does it sound strange?”
Bob: “Good Heavens! How could a wood-cutter be allowed to practise medicine?”
The mayor: “Woody too is an encyclopaedia. He can do everything – from mending shoes, treating patients to repairing TV sets.”
The mayor sat at the desk, opened a drawer, took out a piece of paper, filled it, sealed it and handed it to Bob.
The mayor, to Bob: “Here you are, sir.”
Bob: “Thank you Mecha… mecha… cha… mayor.”
Bob dashed out.
Bob and John were soon wandering in the streets again.
John: “I am hungry. How about you, Bob?”
Bob: “Me, too. How about going to that bakery over there? Maybe we’ll find some pastry.”
Bob and John walked inside the bakery. A huge man stood behind the counter. The bakery is empty.
Bob, to the baker: “We’d like some pastry, please.”
The baker forwarded them a book: “Choose the kind you like.”
Bob opened the book. It was full of colorful pictures of pastry. Bob put his finger on a beautiful cake’s picture and said to the baker, “We’d like two pieces of this, please.”
The baker, to Bob: “Two Doll Eros.”
Bob gave the baker two Doll Eros.
The baker, to Bob and John: “Your addresses, please…”
Bob, puzzled: “Why do you want our addresses?”
The baker: “To send you your pastry. We do not make them here. We import them from Bare Buda. So you need to wait for six months, maybe less…”
Bob: “Sorry, sir. We can’t wait all that time. Would you please give us our money back?”
The baker, threatening: “You’re joking?”
Bob, who got the message: “Yes, sir. We’re just joking. Like you…”
Bob and John walked out of the bakery. They were strolling in a street now. Suddenly they met with the Stony Hearted park keeper.
The park keeper: “Hello! How are you?”
Bob and John, who recognized him: “Fine, thanks.”
The park keeper: “Where are you going?”
Bob: “We are leaving the town.”
The park keeper, surprised: “You’re leaving? Without your voice-robbers? Listen to me. It is a shame to let you go home without your things. That will be a very bad souvenir for you. I’m going to help you. Just go to the Barren Theatre.”
Bob, interrupting the park keeper: “What? There is a theatre here? Has it got any relationship with our tape-recorders?”
The park keeper: “Just go straight along and turn right. You are then at the Barren Theatre.
Half an hour later, Bob and John arrived at the Barren Theatre and went in. They sat on two comfortable seats. On the stage, actors were playing a war scene. They were dressed as commandos and were heavily armed.
A soldier was looking for something. An officer came up to him and asked: “You’ve lost something?”
The soldier, pointing his finger to a tape-recorder lying on the ground, replied: “…..My alarm-clock…”
Bob felt scandalized and started shouting angrily to the actors on the stage: “It is not an Alarm Clock!!! It is a tape-recorder!”
At these words the soldiers started firing with real bullets at the horrified audience. A soldier, firing with his automatic shotgun, cries at the audience’s face, “Take this rubbish… That’s what we keep in store for non-residents at Rocky Eyes!”
Bob and John rushed out and succeeded in escaping safely.
Bob and John were leaving the town for real now. At that moment they heard a voice behind them. It was the park keeper again. Bob and John waited for him.
The park keeper: “Hello. Did you find your machines?”
Bob, upset: “Thank you. We don’t need them anymore.”
Bob and John started walking out of Rocky Eyes. The park keeper was walking behind them.
The park keeper: “Where are you going?”
Bob, reluctantly: “We’re leaving I said.”
The park keeper: “You really do not want to have your machines back?”
Bob: “No we don’t.”
The park keeper: “Will you wait for a few seconds?”
Bob surprised: “Why?”
The park keeper ran away. A few minutes later he came back with two tape-recorders. He handed them to Bob and John. Bob and John were delighted.
John and Bob, simultaneously: “My tape-recorder?”
The park keeper disappeared, leaving Bob and John alone. Bob lifted his tape-recorder up to his ears. He heard a ‘tic-tac’! He switched the tape-recorder on. It started ringing! The same thing happened to John’s tape-recorder. The two men walked out of the town of Rocky Eyes, each one taking his alarm clock, sorry, his tape-recorder in his hands and shouting:
“Impossible! Impossible!
Nothing in this place
Is in its right place,
Nor are their people
Recommendable”
In Rocky Eyes, You may try
To understand why,
Everything is unbelievable,
Bob there became a poet,
Incredible!
Review or comment on Rocky Eyes –
Essays by Hammoudi Abdelwahab:
- Director – Lantern of Hope
- The Private Path to Prosperity
- Understanding Someone Goes Through Understanding His Culture
- Red for Danger
- Morality
- Languages
- The Big Illusion
- Time Anxiety
- The Virtual World
- Sadists
- The Bulimia and the Alien
- The Periodical Neurocycle
- Teachers
- Globalization
- Perception
- Love
- Hatred
- JMP
- The Missed Opportunity